Hello everyone. If you don’t know me, that’s fine because I really just came out of nowhere. I am a friend of @MrMinty233 on instagram who knows him in person, and the things he said about this place to me in my chatroom is at the very least, disturbing.

I’ve done a lot of research on this fandom and checked every single corner and secret about its dark history and all I can say is your doing this game a disgrace for all the work Tour De Pizza put into it, I’ve seen arguably worse fandoms do better than this. What other platform actively scares away its userbase, because I didn’t decide to join until just recently due to what was happening at that moment.

So allow me to explain my beliefs on what a hypothetical perfect version of this fandom could be, and we’ll all be on our way.

Do not attempt to contact me afterwards for any questions, insults, or etc, I won’t reply, for I will NOT get addicted to this place like many other users here, Nor will I actually hear the fact that I’ve hurt your feelings.

DISCUSSIONS

Let’s just get this out of the way first, The off-topic category entirely has to go. Not only has it transformed this place into a website that talks about anything but Tour De Pizza’s work/future projects, but it’s also just a breeding ground for controversy. Name me one time a megathread has not endured any scandals.

And let me specify, ONLY THE OFF-TOPIC CATEGORY HAS TO BE REMOVED. I’ve seen how desperate some of you people get when the discussion tab is at risk, because metaphorically the ability to speak is the only thing keeping the place alive. I know that, You know that, We all know that. So don’t think I’m actively trying to ruin the lives of many.

GUIDELINES

Just about every single guideline here has a flaw, and I will explain how they can be fixed in numerical order.

1:

Enforce it more, none of you know how to keep arguments civil.

1.1:

Not only is this not enforced but you're missing out one of the key things that count as personal attacks, rants, they are basically a big wall of text reprimanding someone and in worse cases putting fake allegations on someone. It’s sickening to me. Also, we just had someone break this guideline recently, by copying Minty’s art with malicious intent to make fun of him, completely ignoring the part that says “Insulting a monster makes you a monster yourself.” 

1.2:

I have nothing to say.

1.3:

Remove it entirely. Holding in vents is just a way of setting someone up to blow up in a fit of rage. Not only that but due to how off-topic this place has become, why ban the talk of politics?

1.4:

Also remove it, I can’t even count on my fingers on how many times common sense is just never used.

2:

I have nothing to say.

3:

Remove it, this guideline in general is just flawed because I haven’t seen a single issue regarding someone impersonating another user/celebrity.

4:

I have nothing to say.

4.1:

Remove it. This guideline seems pretty targeted towards a few users. Additionally, I’ve taken notes on user movement and about 2.3 times a day someone either explicitly asks for attention/upvotes or throws a tantrum over being bored out of their mind.

4.2:

I have nothing to say.

5:

I am telling you the truth when Minty posted an image of this guideline in my chatroom I almost kicked him out for lying because there was no way a fandom would get away with saying “NSFW content is allowed”. But alas, I was wrong.

This is the biggest flaw in the entire fandom because I just know someone made an account, checked the guidelines, read only up to that point, and posted a naked breast online for everyone to see and didn’t get in trouble for it.

Also, you have to enforce this rule better, the subtlety part makes users post things that would count as NSFW outright in other fandoms and you mods seemingly have a bias towards who can and can’t make a sexual reference, but I’ll talk about the staff in a little bit.

6: 

Remove it, this is broken by a mod constantly after a post has been locked.

7: 

I have nothing to say.

7.1: 

Remove it, this is broken constantly as well therefore it isn’t needed nor does it need to be enforced.

8:

I have nothing to say.

9.1: 

Remove it, this isn’t enforced enough and so many new hires got away with breaking this rule.

9.2: 

Enforce it to your colleagues, they do not follow the guidelines at all.

9.3:

Enforce it, this guideline should also include ban times for biasness.

9.4:

Remove it, I’ve gone through many messages between mods and only 1 staff member uses this warning style, but it’s not even the template provided.

9.5:

I have nothing to say.

9.6:

I have nothing to say.

10 & 10.1:

Remove it. That is actually racist, I am surprised no one called the staff out on this, especially since the Spanish version of the fandom is insanely unfinished, only having 46 pages, but also the game literally has options to change the language. So why discriminate against users that do not have English as their native language?

11:

Remove it, the guideline isn’t used and every staff member has a different view of each guideline which could contradict what another staff member could say about it.

12:

I have nothing to say.

13:

Enforce it more, this is broken by many, staff included.

14:

Remove it, Mini-Modding actually helps a lot, especially since staff schedules in this fandom are so scuffed.

15:

I have nothing to say.

16:

Remove it, Not only do warnings not exist but this guideline actually does the opposite of what it’s supposed to do. This guideline is basically telling a user to keep any false allegations on them or else they’d get in trouble for deleting it.

17:

I have nothing to say.

18:

Remove it. It’s not used, it was added at a very poor time, it completely clashes with Guideline 5’s description of talking about fictional characters, and also it's just rudely targeted to this one user named @CTedi25 that posted about them. (I believe I got their nametag wrong)

19:

I have nothing to say.

STAFF MEMBERS

In this section, I will be going over my selection of users who would be great for this fandom, as well as talking about everyone in the Wiki Staff/Past page and see if they re-deserve their role. I will be leaving out Content Moderators because in a lighthearted manner, Content Moderators are the Gold Armor To Thread Moderators’ Diamond Armor.

Now for my vision, the perfect staff would consist of the following,

BUREAUCRATS:

@Cinnafrost

@Cynuzi With the absolute solver

ADMINS:

@ThomasH3arts

@ZeldaPro97

@CharlieTheMilkWoman

@GeudoCheede

THREAD MODERATORS:

@FROGGUTZZZZ

@FlameBurstForever

@IcedTeaCharizard

@Nubasik07

Now for all the past staff members that are still able to be contacted,

LuckyRalph:

I don’t see them fit for any job.

MrMinty233:

When he acts like an adult he might be able to climb back to his role as a bureaucrat but judging by how this place views things his chances are extremely low.

SnipemoreRumbleton:

I do not know if his schedule is too full due to him releasing a game soon but having him as a trial Thread Moderator would be nice, in this dump of a place, there’s no such thing as too many staff members.

FlameBurstForever:

Due to being insanely inactive at times they need to go back to a Thread Moderator until their schedule gets fixed because I have seen users ask her for guidance and her not responding for 48 hours.

MurderHornetTheHiveWing:

Their reason for demotion was actually dumb, I can see her becoming a Thread Moderator in the coming months.

SlimeRancherPlayer99:

Due to the user demoting themselves, I don’t think me believing they’d be a good moderator would do anything. This user was once an admin and I can see them doing well.

CalamityDespair:

Their actions slowly drained their likeliness of regaining their role, from the abusive playfights to the example I used them in for guideline 5, they just can’t become a part of the team again.

Krispilmao:

They used up all their miracles avoiding any legal action in their past. The only reason it’s simply listed as “Drama” is due to biasness working in their favor. I can go for hours talking about this user but this post is quite lengthy so we’ll move on by simply saying that they have no shot at being a candidate.

StickmansGarage:

Same issue with Snipemore, They’d be a good staff member but due to being brothers with him Snipemore might have Stickman answer any questions while he works any patch notes or side projects for his game. They both need to be trial moderators to accompany their likely busy schedule.

And that’s it. That’s my idea for a drama-free version of the Pizza Tower Fandom. Thank you for your time and I’ll see you the next time Minty whines about this place on Instagram.

After reviewing the results, discussing, arguing, waiting, fixing, voting, breaking-the-tie-ing, revoting, and finalizing,

*gasps for breath*

we would like to happily welcome the newest members to our staff team!

@Bungerlover2 for Thread Moderator

@TheActualMilkMan and @TheUnofficialGamingDoge* for Content Moderators! Applause in the chat!

@CinnaFrost the roles, if you don't mind?

*My alt getting cmod is only for emergency stuff JIC, like my alt getting blocked or something similar to where I cannot access my main account.